My favourite thing about being at the condo is my kitties. It is amazing how I can be away for months but the second they see me they come running. Again this is not just the feral cats but also the pets. They all know that I will give them treats and if they allow me they get some scritchies. Yesterday I actually fed 14 of them with only 2 of my usual group missing. So since I have been back I have fed the kities, seen monkies, thrown marshmallows at the agressive coatie but most importantly today, I saw my little friend Mia the chihuahua. When she saw me she refused to go with her owner and started dancing knowing what was coming. All of this (well, except the coatie) really make me happy.
For 4 days this week I have managed to get back to my routine. Here is what that includes, an early morning walk followed by a fitness class then another morning walk. I did have some technical problems the 1st few days regarding the fitness classes as for some reason the camera attached to the tv wouldn’t work nor would the microphone. I let the instructors know so they realized I was participating. This morning I did manage to get everything working which made for a much improved experience.
My goal while I am here is that weekdays I do walk/class/walk for a total of 3 hours of workouts. I do some other walking such as going to the recycle centre every few days as well. I have now kept my goal 4 days this week but I am realistic. For example, tomorrow my sister and I are going on a tour and are being picked fairly early in the morning. It doesn’t mean that I won’t do anything, I’ll still get in the 5:45am walk it’s just I won’t be doing the 2nd walk nor the fitness class. But that is ok, I can’t expect my sister to miss out on experiences just because I am a bit neurotic about working out. We have agreed to try and book what we can later in the morning but the ocasional miss is ok.
Yes, I am back at ‘er. The only thing I haven’t really done is go for a run. I’ll be honest, even 1st thing in the morning it is really warm and humid and I just can’t bring myself to run in that kind of weather. Instead, I am really trying to pick up my pace when walking to make up for it.
Ok, you may look at the title and think, what does this have to do with her health and fitness. Well, quite frankly, a lot. I volunteer every week when I am home to facilitate a caregivers’ support group. I started doing it when they asked for volunteers and not only am I a trained facilitator but I am a caregiver, initially for my 2 siblings. I realized it was a good fit and I must say the things that I have learned have been pretty amazing. As well, it sometimes gives me the opportunity to vent about some of the things that I have had to deal with. That in turn helps alleviate some stress and thus help with my own mental health. Hence, it does fit in with my journey.
I do want to start by acknowledging that the people in my group are nothing short of heroic. By that I mean I don’t know if I could do what they do in terms of looking after their loved ones. Trust me this goes way beyond advocacy, I’m talking things like providing nursing services, dealing with incontinence, having to answer the same questions over and over every day, putting aside their own needs regularly to put the caree first, battling with blended family members who often don’t assist but demand input into care and most of all watching their loved one deteriorate and not be able to do anything about it. They then are told by our system that the wait for long term care is 3 years and that our health authority requires the caregiver to continue their support work, whether they are qualified to do so or not. Ultimately it is almost like you need to bankrupt yourself before it become emergent for the caree to be placed in supportive care.
But let me say this, every week I hear how this support group is what keeps them going. They have become like a big family and get so concerned when someone from the group doesn’t attend. The group shares everything they have learned and we all work through someone’s challenges when they arise. And, if there is someone who needs the airspace to talk more than the rest in the group, it is always given without being asked. So maybe heroic is not the only word I should use, thoughtful, loving, caring and devoted are some others that are important.
The reason I wanted to do this post is because of what I saw on a local news station from home this morning. They were interviewing a psychotherapist to recognize National Caregivers Day and the topic was around caregiver burnout. I was astounded by what the therapist recommended, when things are overwhelming call a family member or friend to go out for coffee, go for a walk, find something to do for your own self-care. Now don’t get me wrong, these are all great suggestions but are somewhat out of touch. Many of the people in my group cannot leaved their caree for any length of time. Seriously, it is fulltime care in order to keep them safe. I’m sure these people would love to be able to do these things but without some sort of respite or paid home care it is not possible. You might ask then how do they attend these group sessions, it is because they have managed to get into an adult daycare which allows them a few hours away from their loved one. The lucky ones get a couple days a week, the others it is one day.
So if you know a caregiver reach out and see if there is anyway you can help them. Many will decline but maybe be a little adament about doing things like hey, why don’t we set up a phone date each week. Or, can I do some shopping for you? Even just drop off something nice for them. Just be supportive.
And mostly, today recognize the heroes that these people truly are.
Well, we made it down to the condo late Wednesday afternoon. We got everything all unpacked and put away which really doesn’t take much time. Thursday we went first to a nearby Chedraui to stock up on groceries (and tequila). We then went to a nearby mall to get my sister a sim card and I thought I’d just pop into the Walmart and pick up a couple things I wasn’t able to get at the last store. When I got to the cashier I realized my wallet was missing. Trust me when I say panic set in. I am convinced I lost it at the first store when I bent down to pick up the case of water from the bottom of the shopping caught. My cab driver is convinced that if that had happened he would have seen it but who knows.
We went back the Chedraui and they were awesome doing everything to help. Even the cashier and bagger got down on hands and knees to look everywhere at the checkout. They took my number and promised to WhatsApp me if it was turned in. My cab driver even went back there late in the afternoon to see if it had turned up but it hadn’t. I then posted on an Ex-Pats group on FaceBook and got great advice on doing a search across all the Playa FB groups. Someone told me to contact the Canadian Consulate as it might have been turned in there (of course Easter weekend so I doubt I will get a response before Tuesday). There was some money in the wallet but I am not concerned about that. I am concerned about all my cards so I have locked all of them (didn’t want to replace them until I hear from the consulate because there are a lot of preauthorized payments that need to be changed). All in all it was a really stressful day though I know at this point I have little optimism that I will get it back.
Thursday night my sister made a suggestion, take a few days off from your workouts and lets just have some fun. I was just going to take 1 day but thought, you know what, she’s right. I made the commitment in my head that I would give myself a break until Monday and then get back to at least 3 hours M-F and 2 hours S-S. When I made that decision I already felt a little better.
So yesterday we headed in to town so that we could have lunch at my favourite restaurant. Before going to the restaurant we wondered around the area as my sister had never been in this particular area before and when she suggested stopping for a drink I took her to a little gem my husband and I had found. We each enjoyed a martini and I promised her we would go back there. At lunch my favourite server was there and he was thrilled my sister had a British Columbia pin for him. The owner also happened to be there and loved the fact I was wearing one of the restaurant’s t-shirts. Then we stopped in to visit an awesome dog owned by friends. The poor dog had surgery and need treats from his ‘autie’. It was a really fun day.
Today we have decided to do a few things around the condo. We did a bit of a tidy this morning while I got in a short walk to the recycling center. I’m going to be making a batch of cranberry margaritas then we are filling up the floaties for the pool. The plan for this afternoon is to relax on the deck and play crib, scrabble and backgammon while listening to music. Tomorrow we are going back in to town with 8 others to go for Easter brunch. The weather is supposed to be nice so I hope for some pool time when we get back.
I really don’t see the harm in a few days of fun. It’s been 6 years since my sister has been down to the condo and back then we didn’t have much of a social network and certainly didn’t know anything other than the main street in Playa so everything is new to her. I’m pretty dedicated to staying on track as much as possible while I am here so have no qualms I’ll be back to hitting it hard on Monday.
I think after the stress of Thursday a few days of fun is exactly what I should be doing.
Yesterday I had one of those insanely busy days. I started with my early morning fitness class. Then I did a 2 hour walk (the weather was nice but a bit chilly). Did the usual Monday morning coffee with the walking group before we headed off. After walking another 1 1/2 hours it was home to do the community volunteer income tax clinic before heading to a meeting at the bank to set up some accounts. By time I was finished and home at 5:30pm I had been on the run for over 12 hours. I hate when that happens right before I head off to Mexico.
Because the day was so busy my husband and sister (strongly) suggested that I skip the fitness class and run this morning. Of course I argued saying I could get it all in but then they reminded me of the time crunch I would be in and the stress that would bring. I pondered this for a while and realized they were both right, I was setting myself up so that I would be starting my trip all stressed out and who needs that.
So instead I slept in a bit this morning after a good night’s sleep. I had some chai tea with breakfast (chai always makes me feel better) and slowly got through my to do list for the day. Now, I am just kicking back and relaxing. I even went through my Mexico check list and everything is packed. All I have left to do is pack my iPad and facilitate my caregivers’ support group. Nice and easy and stress free.
Normally the only thing that would impact my peaceful day is getting all worked up about not working out. Have no fear, I’ll get in a good hour walk later this morning. During that walk I plan to just apreciate my husband and sister who recognized what would be best for me today which helped take away the stress I would have felt.
I just got off the phone with an amazing support person helping me with my accounting software. I couple weeks ago they had set up my files so that instead of saving them to usb drives all the time (which causes them to be unstable and I often can’t get them to open or backup) they are saved to a cloud allowing me to have access on any device that has the accounting program. It worked well until I had to restore a file from backup and then it all went south or so I thought. A very helpful tech resolved the issue in about 1 minute. The good news is I now know what to do if the situation arises again.
Yesterday it was a strength class first thing in the morning. We did 2 different sets each with various exercises for which you had to do a certain number of reps for 4 rounds. The first set started with deadlifts and I selected a barbell with what I thought would be adequate weights, 85lbs. It was tough but I go through the required 6 reps on each round. I finished off all of the exercises but kept staring at a barbell only one participant had used for their deadlifts. I don’t know why but it flashed in my head that I needed to try and lift that barbell. I went over and told the instructor what I was going to do and that other participant shouted out to me Gwenne, keep your core tight. I got into the proper deadlift position and pushed through the soles of my feet and deadlifted 125lbs! I couldn’t believe it, I just lifted 40lbs lighter and had thought it was challenging but apparently not enough. Next 6 reps of deadlifts are going to be at least 95lbs.
I hadn’t done a run on Tuesday so decided I had enough time yesterday to get in a 5k. When I got to the end of the 1st kilometer my Apple Watch gave me my split pace and I thought hmm, that is a bit faster than normal but I doubt I can keep that up the rest of the way but I’ll give it a try. At the end of the 5k (which was done at the faster pace) I realized in the past few weeks I have shed about 1 /1/2 minutes per kilometer. Then today it was my usual Thursday 8k and I decided I was going to try and maintain yesterday’s pace which I did until I had done 5k. I was pretty proud of myself and for some reason decided to push even harder. I ran those last 3k’s at an even faster pace. The end result was my average pace over those 8k’s today was 20 seconds faster than yesterday. Don’t get me wrong, this has only moved me from being a really slow runner to being a slow runner but it is definitely progress.
My instructors at the gym are always telling us how we are stronger than we think and apparently they are correct. But for me I proved over the past couple days that I am actually fitter than I thought. I’m going to use that positive momentum to push myself even more. Maybe one of these days I’ll even master box jumps.
Left the fitness centre this morning and thought, so much for a run today. I had decided after last Monday’s debacle of getting cold and soaked I am just not putting myself through that again. The forecast for today is heavy rain and winds. I have come to the realization that missing 1 day has no overall impact on my training or fitness level. Torturing myself in inclimate weather does however have immense impact on my mental health. It is supposed to be better tomorrow so I will hopefully get a run in then.
Yesterday it was time for my annual physical. This is mandatory for me because of having been diagnosed with diabetes in 2018. As part of this process I get a battery of blood/urine testing done to make sure there are no issues. I was thrilled with almost all of the results. My glucose fast number was bang on target. My A1C (basically the average amount of glucose in my system over the past 3 months) perfectly normal. The best was my GFR which measures kidney health. Normal for a 60 year old is 85, mine is 96! Overall all but 1 indicator show that I am healthy.
The one area that I was concerned about was my cholesterol. It’s not that it is really high it is just my LDL level was slightly above the tartet range. That target range is lower than in people who don’t have diabetes and I was not out of range for non-diabetics.
Now my doctor is very used to me being the type of patient that wants to discuss these things. So she reviews my history so that we can have a discussion. She noted that in October 2018 my A1C was 8.1 which is why I was diaganosed as diabetic. But then she also saw that not one test since then has my A1C been out of range. As she pointed out that is nearly 8 years. I reminded her that for about 2 years I was on diabetic medication along with statins for cholesterol and had been on BP meds for years before that. However, as I lost weight and became more active she kept recommending the lowering or removal of the medications until I got to the point of only taking vitamins. I also advised here that my life changed drastically when I left work as back then I traveled so much there no healthy eating and certainly no exercise.
We got into a discussion about whether I should go back on to a statin for the cholesterol which led us to a discussion on the fact I am a bit of an anomaly when it comes to my health. Apparent people my age don’t normally completely reverse their health issues like I have. She also told me that normally just a diagnosis of diabetes means you should be on a statin but she just didn’t see the need given I have my glucose levels so controlled. Also, other indicators such as my triglycerides have never been out of range so there was no definitive reason for me to be on statins though she said if I wanted to take them just in case she was fine with it. I adivsed that I like being medication free and for as long as I can stay that way I will do everything it takes. We also agreed that if my LDL is still elevated with next year’s test we will reevaluate but she said at this point she is comfortable leaving things the way they are.
I liked being called an anomaly and the fact that it makes my doctor have to analyze everything. I also like the fact that I have a doctor who is willing to include me in decisions about my health rather than just handing out drugs which may not be needed.
Bottom line, my health is an anomaly as it shouldn’t get better as I age. However, with hard work and determination I plan to keep it that way.
Ok, this atmospheric river needs to end. Monday I went out for my usual morning walk after which I meet my seniors’ walking group for coffee before going out on our group walk. Let me tell you, it was wet. Even the sidewalks and pathways through the parks were covered with giant puddles meaning you had to walk through them and get your feet soaked. I pulled off my 2 hour walk but was miserable when I finished not because of the rain but because it was barely above freezing. I had a coffee with the group and then announced I was going home because I couldn’t stop shivering. That was understandable because I was soaked through layers of clothing and my shoes. While I did manage a run in a slight drizzle Tuesday, Monday was the last time I have been out in the rain this week and I am ok with that.
These past couple weeks I have been follwing a group of people on X that promote positive encouragement around running and strength training. It has been very uplifting and it is motivating to me. I don’t care about the ones that tell you that you need to be a super fast long distance runner in order to call yourself a runner or the ones that advocate for lifting extreme weights. Rather, I read the ones that try and lift your fitnes experience up and help you move forward.
And so in my last 9 classes I have started to grow confidence. I realized that I don’t need to do 55lb bench presses, this week it has all been 65lb. Regardless of the exercise if it isn’t challenging me I am adding on more weights. Even today doing back squats (have I mentioned how much I actually hate back squats?) I started out at 55lbs and after round 1 I added more weight without convincing myself I would lower the number of reps. Funny, it didn’t kill me. Even doing pendlay rows I only lifted 1 light round and kept upping my game until it was tough to do.
I have also started to silence the voices in my head telling me I need lighter dumbells for presses and snatches. Now, instead of waiting for the instructor to suggest I up my weights, I start higher than what I was doing and try on the last round to push myself to the max. Funny, I haven’t died yet from grabbing heavier weights so apparently it isn’t that big a risk.
That group on X has really helped me to finally break through the barriers that I thought were stopping me from improving. The only thing stopping me was my own confidence including those voices telling me things would be too difficult to do. Instead, I am not just growing confidence, I am growing strength.
What a difference in weather from yesterday. We started with some sleet yesterday which actually turned into snow as a hopefully final winter storm came through. Today is the exact opposite. I did my 10k run this morning and it was beautiful and clear with an amazing crescent moon in the sky. I went out for a 10k walk afterwards and it was sunny with the ocean really calm. I was so happy to see not just eagles but paddle boarders and people walking on the sand at the water’s edge. I am hoping that is a clear sign that spring is on its way.
Fridays at my fitness centre is circuit training day. The instructor sets up 10 stations with different exercises. We do each exercise for 45 seconds then have 15 seconds to move to the next one. Once all 10 are done we get a full minute break before going on to the next round. This is done a total of 4 times.
Here is what yesterday looked like,
- Bosu burpees – hold the bosu over your head to start then drop to the floor and do a burpee
- Ball pass – lie on the floor starting with your arms overhead holding an exercise ball you raise your arms and legs and pass the ball between them before lowering them and repeating the movement
- Barbell clean – bend over slightly holding the barbell then pull it up to you chest then jump and flip it towards you landing in a squat (this might not be a very understandable discription)
- Banded rotation – using a stong band place your arms straight in front of you then rotate your torso keeping the band tight and after about 10 rotations switch to the other side.
- Ball squats – face the wall, go into a squat and as up come up you toss a medicine ball up the wall catching it as it comes down and going back into the squat as you do the catch
- Rope climb – grab a rope that is anchored to the ceiling with both hands and then lower yourself to the ground lying flat before ‘climbing’ back up the rope until standing
- Hip dips – take a plank position with your forearms on the floor then rotate your hips to one side then the next to ‘dip’ them
- Walking lunges – grab two weights and take a step forward doing a lunge then take the step with your other side
- Seated shoulder press – use the heaviest weights you can bare and do shoulder presses while seated on a bench with your back supported
- Plate walk – use a (minimum) 25lb weight and hold it up with straight arms as you walk around
Now I get that some may read this and think that doesn’t sound too bad but let me tell you, by round three you are dreading many of the moves. By round 4 you just want it over with but for me that is when I up my game and where possible increase some weights. I admit some of these I didn’t mind doing but the burpees, rope climb and plate walk nearly did me in but I refused to stop and quite frankly I was pretty proud of adding weights to the barbell clean when many others hadn’t.
But how do I know it was a good workout? Well, it is when at round 3 I start thinking, I am too old for this shit! Oh did I think that yesterday. And yet, just like most of my brutal fitness classes, I walked out with a smile feeling I had just accomplished something many 60 years can’t or won’t do.
And so all I can say for next week is bring it on, I can do it. Now I’m going to go soak in my hot tub to give my aching joints some water therapy.
Overhead squats? Who the hell thought these would be a good thing? It was the brutal strength class at the fitness centre today and keeping with my I am stronger than I think mantra I decided to push myself once again. The instructor introduced a new exercise, overhead squats. This is when you take a wide stance with both your leg and arms and do squats while holding a barbell over your head (with your arms really straight). The instructor suggeested I do a weighted barbell for snatches and then go to an empty barbell for the squats. Hell no, I added a couple 10 lb weights and got through several rounds. Many of the other participants did this without weights but I am on a mission.
Yesterday I had a Zoom meeting with one of my volunteer organizations. I did that Zoom call while out on a 10k walk. Now please understand this is the busiest time of the year for me as I am doing year end books for my clients, doing taxes for paying clients and doing the Community Volunteer Income Tax Clinic along with my other volunteer and political work. On top of that I am now 3 weeks away from heading off on my 10 week trip to Mexico. Despite all of this while on the call I volunteered to do 3 new projects. Oh but wait, I had also volunteered to facilitate an extra support group this week. Seriously I don’t know what is wrong with me
I got home from my walk yesterday and immediately started working on the 3 projects I had agreed to. It took several hours but I got them done. Then of course it was on to doing some taxes. By time the day was over I was done. I get that saying that if you want something done ask a busy person but I need it to stop being me.
And so, I have committed that for the rest of this month I am not going to be stepping up. Sometimes I get to the point where I am so overwhelmed by what I have committed to that it is suffocating. I’ve still got a pile of work to get done in the next 3 weeks so I am going to work on not adding anything to the pile. But I’ll admit, while I am writing this I know all it will take is for someone to ask me to do something I likely will.
So, I will continue with the lip service that I will stop stepping up but any of you reading this who knows me understands that this is likely completely untrue.
I got home from the gym this morning and listened to the weather forecast where they were predicting snow. Today should have been a run day but I thought hmm, maybe let’s do a rest day something I haven’t done in over 3 weeks. However, then that voice in my head starts up and tells me how bad that would be. And so to quiet the voice I looked at my stats the last 3 weeks and during that time I walked/ran 437 km’s, 697,740 steps and have burned an average of over 3,000 calories a day. I really don’t think taking a rest day is going to do any damage to my work.
I was the first one at the gym today and the instructor asked if I would set up the barbells for deadlifts. As I was about to start pulling out the plates to put on them she called over, new rule, minimum plates are 25 lbs. I’m like, what? 2 25 lb plates added to the 35 lb barbell means deadlifting 85 lbs. I thought, no way can I do multiple reps at that weight. The instructor looked at me and said, you are stronger than you give yourself credit for though I did not believe that.
I decided I was starting the set with the deadlifts and had i my mind that this was going to be horrible. I focused on my form and pushing through my feet and found it wasn’t that bad. The instructor came over and said, see you can do 3 reps at that weight. I responded that I actually had done 4 reps so next round I’m going to add 10 lbs. While I was finishing the other exercises in the round she brought over 2 5lb plates and 2 10lb plates. When I was ready to do deadlifts again she asked which ones I wanted to add and I said the 10lb plates. Yep, got through 4 reps again. For the final round I made the instructor giddy when I loaded on those 5lb plates as well. When done I did the math and I had done deadlift reps at 115lb’s. Ok, maybe I’m putting up mental barriers and not acknowledging how strong I really am.
I pushed myself during the 2nd round of exercises using weights a little heavier than I normally would and I didn’t die. In the final round we had to do side bends and I had convinced myself that I should use a 25lb weight rather than the 20lb I normally use. After the first set I thought now would be a good time to push myself so I upped the ante to a 30lb weight. And you know what, it felt pretty damn good.
I realize I probably should have upped these weights a while ago but there is always that fear that I am going to fail. But, the instructor reminded us that it’s ok needing to go to a lower weight, just do the higher number of reps. I guess that too is success.
I came out of the class with the mindset that going forward each week I will increase weights in some way. I figure if I can conquer the mental barriers around how strong I am next I can conquer my fear of doing box jumps. Hopefully I’ll be writing about that soon.
gwennefarrell 